Anyway we're playing our first Los Angeles area show tomorrow with some very cool bands and we're gonna mainly play new songs nobody knows yet (except for the cats) and the flyer has a sandwich person on it; how can you go wrong?
Go Chargers \_/
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Grav Cats
There are 2 neighborhood/(stray?) cats who come and sit outside the garage whenThe Gravitys practice at Shane's house lately; they're both very fluffy and one talks a lot more than the other, but I kinda feel like that quiet one is the one who actually gets us and the loud meower is like a very enthusiastic tag-along who constantly needs attention. The cat who just chills by the tree and doesn't want us to pet him but also doesn't run far when we approach....I feel you bro. Kick it where you're at. Thanks for listening.
Anyway we're playing our first Los Angeles area show tomorrow with some very cool bands and we're gonna mainly play new songs nobody knows yet (except for the cats) and the flyer has a sandwich person on it; how can you go wrong?
Go Chargers \_/
Anyway we're playing our first Los Angeles area show tomorrow with some very cool bands and we're gonna mainly play new songs nobody knows yet (except for the cats) and the flyer has a sandwich person on it; how can you go wrong?
Go Chargers \_/
Saturday, January 25, 2014
DAD REVIEW: John George Campbell
I'm supposed to play an acoustic show tonight so I put my guitar in the car in case that maybe I have to go straight from the call center to the warehouse, or what if I end up at Spenny's or something and I don't go home at all? It'll be such a bigger hassle for everybody involved if I have to go back to the house and get my guitar, especially since I am playing alone with just that.
But we got to talking about life stuff on the way to the office and when I got out I just ran inside because Elaina wasn't gonna be there and I had to unlock the door for everybody else to get in.
I just got on the phones like usual and didn't think about the guitar until all the sudden my dad walked in the office with it. He could see I was on a call and didn't want to disturb me but he put it next to my cubicle and kinda motioned at me. When I got off the call he was already halfway out the door but I yelled at him, "Thank you! I love you dad!" and he turned back and waved. It had been enough time since I got dropped off that clearly he had probably gotten all the way home and then turned back around to get my guitar to me, because he knew I would be freaking out once I realized my own mistake.
A few minutes later my coworker Ashley, a 27-year-old single mother of an 8-year-old girl she struggles every day to support, looked at me and said, "You know what you have, right?"
And I said, "Yeah."
But we got to talking about life stuff on the way to the office and when I got out I just ran inside because Elaina wasn't gonna be there and I had to unlock the door for everybody else to get in.
I just got on the phones like usual and didn't think about the guitar until all the sudden my dad walked in the office with it. He could see I was on a call and didn't want to disturb me but he put it next to my cubicle and kinda motioned at me. When I got off the call he was already halfway out the door but I yelled at him, "Thank you! I love you dad!" and he turned back and waved. It had been enough time since I got dropped off that clearly he had probably gotten all the way home and then turned back around to get my guitar to me, because he knew I would be freaking out once I realized my own mistake.
A few minutes later my coworker Ashley, a 27-year-old single mother of an 8-year-old girl she struggles every day to support, looked at me and said, "You know what you have, right?"
And I said, "Yeah."
Thursday, January 23, 2014
EXPERIENCE REVIEW: Breaking My Funeral Oration CD
Funeral Oration is a melodic punk rock band from Amsterdam that played music between the mid-1980s until the late-1990s. I first heard them on a compilation promo CD for Hopeless Records that I got at the first Warped Tour that I went to, when I was like 11 or 12 years old. I saw Good Riddance and Green Day and NOFX that day when they were all relevant. Snapcase taught me that there was a thing called "hardcore music." I met the Mighty Mighty Bosstones at an autograph tent but the singer's voice was so coarse that I didn't understand what he said to me. It was fucking awesome.
At the time I wasn't really into "punk rock" yet, however;
I didn't fully understand it; I liked the Smashing Pumpkins and Radiohead and Nine Inch Nails and I thought that music was supposed to be high-brow and complex and sophisticated and shit; Why is everybody just acting like normal people? Wearing shorts and shit, come on.
For awhile after I got the CD it just kinda sat around the already-ridiculous pile of music that will forever plague my living situations, but seemingly the same week that I realized the genius of The Ramones I also latched onto Funeral Oration's track "Unreal" that's at the very end of "Hopelessly Devoted To You Too";
It's the song just before The Weakerthans track that I now perform sometimes with KP when we do acoustic Gravitys stuff.
Although they were arguably the least-promoted, least-accessible, least-scene band that I had "discovered" at that festival, for some reason they really hit me hard. The dude's voice, it's so fucking peculiar - it's almost like he is yodeling or something but there is absolutely no subtext of humor or irony or anything; homeboy just yodels. That's how he expresses himself.
One day in 8th grade, when me and Mark and our other old-school friends who were all learning about Crass and wearing the same back patches at the same time, we made a trip to Filthy's Records in Lake Elsinore just to go buy punk stuff because there was no punk stuff in Temecula then. I mean, there was, but it was lame post-Blink 182 stuff and we were lame post-post-Misfits kids; totally different.
We picked up other things that day (free copies of Skratch magazine; Propagandhi patches; Bouncing Souls posters; etc) but for me the prize was the Funeral Oration "Discography" double-CD set that I had miraculously found in the mess of go-nowhere 90s-punk CDs scattered in that place.
I just knew, I fucking knew it, you're gonna love this Ian and if you don't get this now you will never ever get it. Nobody likes this band; Nobody knows this band. You will never come across this thing ever again.
The "Discography" title for that double-CD is extremely misleading because it's actually more of a compilation of Funeral Oration's best tracks from their multitude of un-reissused albums instead of a comprehensive collection of ALL the songs (which is what I wanted). But its fucking awesome and the very second that I heard the song "Where Do You Go?" I loved punk rock. I distinctly remember that moment. I was laying in my bed in the afternoon and that song came on and I was like, "holy shit: punk rock."
No one could ever tell you how sacrilegious this next statement is the way I would, but it is (unfortunately?) 100% true for me:
The Ramones didn't get me into punk rock. They didn't make the ultimate statement that I was looking for.
Funeral Oration made me love punk rock.
Funeral Oration means so much more to me than it seems most bands ever mean to anybody. When I talk about this band, I already know that whoever I'm talking to doesn't really know what it is, that I am kinda introducing them to this thing that I love so dearly. Sure, they probably get the reference points of Bad Religion and "skate-punk," etc., but they have never heard the glory that is Funeral Oration and they will never understand until they hear it. Maybe they won't hear what I hear, but I hear it.
Many years have passed (a fucking decade or so if we wanna get real) since I first got that compilation and in that time I purchased several F.O. LPs from shady German distros and kinda quietly got the people who are actually important in my life to maybe give the band a try. It's not the kind of thing I want to push in people's faces, but I do think people should know.
Because I love them.
The second CD of the set is actually a studio recording of Funeral Oration performing some of their 90s tracks live. I always kinda disregarded it because alot of whats on there is represented on the first disc in their original versions. But I lost that first CD somewhere along the way and for the last couple nights I've been listening to that live set in between news pieces on TV and obsessive repetition of "Junebug" by The B-52's.
I had that CD in my pocket this morning because I wanted to listen to it on the way to work. I'm such a haphazard bastard that I put CDs into my jean pockets and expect them not to be damaged, but physics and form are real things so when I lunged into the car the CD snapped.
I immediately felt it and I pulled the fragments out of my pocket in utter disbelief.
Did I just break a Funeral Oration CD? MY Funeral Oration CD? THE ONLY FUNERAL ORATION CD THAT EXISTS???
In my mind, this is something that cannot be replaced. Despite the background status this music holds for me, it's still the background of my life, the thing I fall back on without telling anyone.
How could I have done this?
No one else can ever understand except for me.
"Where Do You Go?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jG4-TMR9q-M
At the time I wasn't really into "punk rock" yet, however;
I didn't fully understand it; I liked the Smashing Pumpkins and Radiohead and Nine Inch Nails and I thought that music was supposed to be high-brow and complex and sophisticated and shit; Why is everybody just acting like normal people? Wearing shorts and shit, come on.
For awhile after I got the CD it just kinda sat around the already-ridiculous pile of music that will forever plague my living situations, but seemingly the same week that I realized the genius of The Ramones I also latched onto Funeral Oration's track "Unreal" that's at the very end of "Hopelessly Devoted To You Too";
It's the song just before The Weakerthans track that I now perform sometimes with KP when we do acoustic Gravitys stuff.
Although they were arguably the least-promoted, least-accessible, least-scene band that I had "discovered" at that festival, for some reason they really hit me hard. The dude's voice, it's so fucking peculiar - it's almost like he is yodeling or something but there is absolutely no subtext of humor or irony or anything; homeboy just yodels. That's how he expresses himself.
One day in 8th grade, when me and Mark and our other old-school friends who were all learning about Crass and wearing the same back patches at the same time, we made a trip to Filthy's Records in Lake Elsinore just to go buy punk stuff because there was no punk stuff in Temecula then. I mean, there was, but it was lame post-Blink 182 stuff and we were lame post-post-Misfits kids; totally different.
We picked up other things that day (free copies of Skratch magazine; Propagandhi patches; Bouncing Souls posters; etc) but for me the prize was the Funeral Oration "Discography" double-CD set that I had miraculously found in the mess of go-nowhere 90s-punk CDs scattered in that place.
I just knew, I fucking knew it, you're gonna love this Ian and if you don't get this now you will never ever get it. Nobody likes this band; Nobody knows this band. You will never come across this thing ever again.
The "Discography" title for that double-CD is extremely misleading because it's actually more of a compilation of Funeral Oration's best tracks from their multitude of un-reissused albums instead of a comprehensive collection of ALL the songs (which is what I wanted). But its fucking awesome and the very second that I heard the song "Where Do You Go?" I loved punk rock. I distinctly remember that moment. I was laying in my bed in the afternoon and that song came on and I was like, "holy shit: punk rock."
No one could ever tell you how sacrilegious this next statement is the way I would, but it is (unfortunately?) 100% true for me:
The Ramones didn't get me into punk rock. They didn't make the ultimate statement that I was looking for.
Funeral Oration made me love punk rock.
Funeral Oration means so much more to me than it seems most bands ever mean to anybody. When I talk about this band, I already know that whoever I'm talking to doesn't really know what it is, that I am kinda introducing them to this thing that I love so dearly. Sure, they probably get the reference points of Bad Religion and "skate-punk," etc., but they have never heard the glory that is Funeral Oration and they will never understand until they hear it. Maybe they won't hear what I hear, but I hear it.
Many years have passed (a fucking decade or so if we wanna get real) since I first got that compilation and in that time I purchased several F.O. LPs from shady German distros and kinda quietly got the people who are actually important in my life to maybe give the band a try. It's not the kind of thing I want to push in people's faces, but I do think people should know.
Because I love them.
The second CD of the set is actually a studio recording of Funeral Oration performing some of their 90s tracks live. I always kinda disregarded it because alot of whats on there is represented on the first disc in their original versions. But I lost that first CD somewhere along the way and for the last couple nights I've been listening to that live set in between news pieces on TV and obsessive repetition of "Junebug" by The B-52's.
I had that CD in my pocket this morning because I wanted to listen to it on the way to work. I'm such a haphazard bastard that I put CDs into my jean pockets and expect them not to be damaged, but physics and form are real things so when I lunged into the car the CD snapped.
I immediately felt it and I pulled the fragments out of my pocket in utter disbelief.
Did I just break a Funeral Oration CD? MY Funeral Oration CD? THE ONLY FUNERAL ORATION CD THAT EXISTS???
In my mind, this is something that cannot be replaced. Despite the background status this music holds for me, it's still the background of my life, the thing I fall back on without telling anyone.
How could I have done this?
No one else can ever understand except for me.
"Where Do You Go?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jG4-TMR9q-M
Saturday, January 4, 2014
ALBUM REVIEW: Apathean - "Eve"
Part I: The Relationship
Apathean is an alternative metal band based out of Riverside that I've been friends with since they first played at The Dial warehouse a little over a year and a half ago. I actually missed that initial performance, but it was uniformly reported to me to have been terrible. They were arbitrarily moving their equipment around mid-set, going for some odd shock-rock aesthetic perhaps, but whatever they did was lame according to everybody I talked to. They did already have an EP recorded called "Aggregation," however, that I enjoyed and saw obvious potential in; Kevin from Crisis Arm saw the same and gave them a talking-to about their performance shenanigans, which must have been taken to heart because when I did finally see them perform they were sufficiently dope. Apathean has grown steadily ever since then and in my opinion are one of the stronger, more unique groups in the current Southern California heavy music scene.
Besides just their badass music the people in the band are good-natured and quick-witted as well, and on the whole a cool group of people to have as friends.
Ashtin let me borrow some red basketball shorts one time that he didn't realize he was actually giving me.
Part II: The Request
Before their recent album "Eve" was even completed, Ashtin and Kevin were already asking me to review it in this very blog. As with the review request I got from The Nuclear Family several months prior, I could not for the life of me understand why anyone would want to subject themselves to my online 'opinion' because I just cannot help it but to hate on goddamn everything. They were hip to that, however, and specifically asked me to be harsh in my analysis. I can't remember which one it was, but I got instructions from one of them along the lines of 'find all the things that you don't like on the album, write extensively about those things, and we're gonna use those as [ironic] promo quotes.'
Whatever. Don't tell me what to do.
Part III: The Recording
I was not present at any stage of the recording of "Eve," so everything you are about to read is pure heresy.
My little brothers in The Coltranes were asked to do guest vocals on this album, which was actually my first notification of its impending existence. When they came back from the recording session Spencer was all pissy about something because that fool can always find something to be pissy about and that is why we are such good friends. The first gripe was that they had thought they were recording in Riverside and were already lagging, but when they picked up Ashtin he was like, "nah man the studio is in L.A! We're already late!" So right off the bat things were all rushed and shitty.
They got to the place and apparently it was this really really nice professional-status studio, which judging by the end result was the right choice, but the process came with certain formalities that the Tranes saw to be unnecessary. Namely, prior to entering the recording room Spencer was asked to empty his pockets and take off his shoes; his response to this was "MY SHOES?!?!?!?"
Apparently they thought he'd be stomping around or something; I don't know what would give anybody that idea, dude is so laid back.
The next grievance the boys had upon returning from the session was that their role of guest vocals was finished almost immediately, but because they had brought Ashtin up from Riverside they had to wait there ALL FUCKING DAY as the band recorded their parts. Knowing the Apathean kids, that was probably a meticulous, less-than-thrilling process to watch. They told me that the band was doing stuff with acoustic guitars and pianos and shit, which seemed odd at the time but proved beneficial in the long run.
Anyway, Spenny was given a sheet of paper or flashcards with random words on them - something like that I'm not entirely sure the process, like I said I wasn't there - and each word was recorded separately. A phrase was then sliced together from those words and can be heard at the end of "Hera" and its really cool, but we'll get to that later. JJ and Evan can both be heard screaming throughout the album but I'm not sure what parts. There is a lot of screaming on "Eve." For some strange reason Sam Coltrane is listed in the credits as well but wasn't actually there.
Part IV: The Release
I was was asked to perform some acoustic music at the release show for "Eve", which was held at the dA Center For The Arts up in Pomona; perhaps the first in a line of factors stacked against even my ancillary participation with the album, however, I nearly didn't make it. I had spent the previous Friday staying at the Beanvian Stalks Guava house, going to see Liquid play at Alaythia and generally just lok'ing back. I must not have made my intentions for the next day clear, however, because come Saturday morning they were not prepared to drive me from Hemet to Pomona.
Through consistent badgering and guilt-tripping, however, I did manage to convince them to drive me up there, and they promptly turned around upon dumping me in the parking lot near the space.
I met up with Crisis Cats pretty much right away and along with Navis loaded into their van; they had done a live set at some college radio station earlier that day and Cameron hurt her ankle while loading equipment or something, so we went on a search for and ACE bandage and a bottle of wine. Navis wanted a tall can as well and I was hungry as fuck so those were the side missions of the journey. The dA is in the same part of Pomona as The Glass House and Aladdin Jr.'s, which is to say it's nowhere near any convenience stores or liquor stores (at least that we know of), so we aimlessly went to a couple places that didn't have what we needed before finding a Mega Liquor. Their food choices were sparse but I picked up a giant Ramen Bowl and a YooHoo.
The show itself was real cool, with a mix of styles throughout the day. Although I did miss some of the day's events due to the late arrival and the liquor store tomfoolery, some of the stuff I caught that day included a very a good indie set from Point Atlantic, in what I believe was their first show; Odd Future-esque hip hop from the kids in LRDS; harsh noise from Typical Apache; a way-short 3-song set from Crisis Arm; hardcore dopeness from Left Astray; and a 51D set that I talked shit on even though I like that band. I didn't really eat too much of that Ramen Bowl because it had so much damn sodium and it was gross, so I think I was just cranky from no food and took it out by talking shit on 51D. I do stuff like that alot.
Apathean's own set happened in the downstairs basement area, and although their music is very heavy everybody was funtime dancing. I myself may have provided some unnecessarily aggro back-punch HC dancing at certain points but that was it. They are very engaging performers, clearly feeling the music that they are playing with a deepness many bands just don't have.
That show was in June.
Part V: The Response
For a number of reasons, this review took far longer than pretty much any assignment I have taken upon myself to complete in a very long while.
First came the structural issues. Seemingly as a matter of dark fate, perhaps further evidence of the universe opposing this review ever coming to be, all of my music listening devices broke like the very second that Apathean asked me to listen to their album. I hadn't had a working cassette player or record player for years, my iPod was lost on my birthday, and then my little budget CD player took a crap. My laptop finally then reached its fill of viruses and I was relegated to borrowing my mom's tablet to occasionally stream music I don't have to pay much attention to while I stand around drinking and getting high in my room. That wasn't the context in which I wanted to construct my thoughts on this album
Add to this lack of proper listening equipment my increasing responsibilities at my full-time job (that's for another blog), the hustle and bustle of work release and court bullshit (that's for another blog), and my spiraling alcoholism/depression (I don't wanna talk about it), and what you get is a complete lack of focus on anything even relatively intellectually demanding. For like 3 months I couldn't focus on a goddamn thing once I got out of my call center except for increasingly abstract and short "poetry" and "songs" that even I cannot make out the meaning of.
My writer's block was further compounded by the perfectly natural impulses that occurred over the weeks and months passed, where Ashtin and Kevin would bring up things like, "are you still gonna do that review?"/"when am I gonna get to see that review?"/etc. These reminders of my sloth flustered me and amplified the problem; the more guilt-ridden I became, the less I was able to confront the source of my anxiety. The more time that passed, the better I began to believe this article had to be, just to justify the lapse. My self-consciousness was engulfing my ability to get anything done.
Despite my excuses regarding stereos etc, the root of the problem regarding the ridiculous amount of time it took to write this piece lies more in my own compositional tendencies than on any external factors. The facts that I do actively enjoy Apathean's music and that I do interact with them semi-frequently, and that they would actually be anticipating this article's completion, those factors greatly changed the way I normally approach my 'reviews'. Much of the writing that I do manifests itself haphazardly and is regarding background events in my life, or music that I made a snap judgement on and have no real connection towards; this was different. I wanted to actually take the time to sit down with this album and pay attention to it and fully appreciate it, the way I used to enjoy music before everything was just background ambiance to my inconsequential nights at home. Even when Kevin Crisis had played me an early un-mixed version back in May, it was while I was still waking up and my attention wasn't fully there. I never properly digest anything anymore.
The fact that I actually really like this stuff became the primary roadblock to writing, a problem I didn't realize I'd face in the course of composing a simple album review. I came across the dilemma of not being able to talk about stuff I enjoy, not just about Apathean or their album, but in general; I can only talk shit about things I dislike, that I can dismantle and criticize and find problems with. I can't seem to form words of praise that feel genuine to me, like I've never actually expressed admiration in a from-the-heart way, like I don't even know why I like what I like. The more I try to justify or explain things about what I enjoy, the more I find myself speechless. Somehow it makes me feel like I don't actually know myself as well as I think I do and I criticize others and constantly talk shit about things because I cannot come to grips with what makes me feel joy in this world.
Identity Crisis.
At one point I was so desperate to force something out of myself that I considered pulling the ultimate dick move of all time: Just not even listening to the album at all and reviewing my non-listen. They did tell me to be insulting, after all, and I can't think of a bigger insult than outright dismissal. I ran that idea by Spencer, and while the hilarity of such a concept was apparent, he did say that it was a bit over-the-top dickish - even for me. Besides, I did enjoy the early preview of the album when at the Crisis house, and I felt like I'd be cheating myself more than anybody else if I didn't afford it a good solid listen.
My needs will always come first.
Somewhere between Halloween and Thanksgiving I got another budget stereo from my brother's thrift store and started listening to the cassette version of "Eve" on the regular, making notes along the way so I could construct something a little bit more substantial than my usual knee-jerk 'reviews.' Like the compulsive bastard that I am I wrote everything in a notebook first (scattered through several notebooks actually) and then put it together.
I did eventually write a review.
Part VI: The Review
Apathean's newest release "Eve", while only 6 songs long, is a dense piece of work that maintains a thematic focus and arc - despite the disjointed nature of the band's sound - that in my mind pushes it from the realm of being merely a post-demo EP to being a fully-fleshed-out album.The overriding motif of the work appears to be a fascination with femininity that encompasses everything from admiration and protectiveness to confusion and contempt. This is superficially indicated by both the album title and the individual song titles, all of which reference symbolic female figures from history and mythology, and is eluded to throughout the cryptic lyrics within.
The music starts out on "Pandora" with ominously sweet and minimalist acoustic strumming, almost like an old music box, almost like the opening to Poison The Well's "Botchla." It builds with elemental, paranoid noise - a fundamental characteristic stranding through the album - into a heavily pounding intro breakdown that sounds like the end of the world. It eventually swells and collapses under its own weight into a kind of swirling cacophony of distortion until taking the fetal position and finding those music box strings again.
For whatever reason this opening song - particularly the noisy disintegration it climaxes with - conjured a section of the story The Magician's Nephew, the chronological beginning of C.S. Lewis's 'Chronicles of Narnia' series (despite being the final book he actually wrote in his life). While on its face that sentiment may seem off, relating a children's fantasy book to a hardcore/metal album, the more I thought about it the more it made sense.
Simply the name of the song, referencing the release of something formerly hidden into a world that perhaps is not prepared for it, is illustrated early on the book. Two children discover an uncle's hidden attic where he is secretly performing alchemy-esque experiments, and he gives them both some rings which transport them to an alternate reality. It is later revealed that the magic rings were made using a dust given to the alchemist uncle by his godmother, dust from a box that she gave him on her deathbed with instructions to burn it. Instead of following suit and just destroying whatever was there, he searched the box and began his foray into 'magic.'
And so it was that the secrets of the past, intended to never be known again, were released anew into the world.
This etymological connection was not, however, what brought the book to my mind when listening to "Pandora." The ending section of the song, where everything is falling apart, evoked the destruction of Charn - the tale of which I shall recount as such:
Upon putting the magic rings on and being transported, the children find themselves in a lulling forest-like mid-world filled with small pools. The first pool they enter takes them to a desolate and clearly-decaying world with an incredibly large red sun dominating the landscape as though it were falling onto the planet itself. As they explore the terrain they come across an auditorium filled with what appear to be wax figures, expressions of utter terror emblazoned on their faces
At the front of the hall is a bell with ancient writing the children cannot comprehend, and which Penny rings against Digory's urgings against. This action awakens The Queen Jadis, who proudly admits that, generations before this new rebirth, she had intentionally uttered an unutterable magick Word to freeze the entire's world's existence until the whole thing rotted away. Simultaneously as this happened, the bell's ring hastened Charn's collapse, and while trying to escape the crumbling wreckage the children inadvertently bring the evil Queen back to their own 'real' world.
That's what "Pandora" sounds like to me: a red-tinted world about to be consumed by its gigantic dying sun, while the most deeply evil entity - the thing that most rightfully should have been destroyed - escapes to begin again.
On to the next song.
"Antoinette" is perhaps the most straightforward song on the album, but this is Apathean so what that means is "No Heroes"-era Converge-type stop-start pounding chugness with multiple layers of screaming and dissonance. The term 'breakdown' comes to mind but is ultimately inaccurate when describing this band's pacing; it's definitely heavy and timed meticulously but its not in the school of karate-core whatsoever. It's also not as tiresomely dragging as many 'sludge' type slow parts can often be, so modern breakdown terminology might just not be enough to describe them.
Lyrically the song is fairly direct as well, although again that's given Apathean's characteristic off-kilter approach. Whereas the previous song seemed to be referencing mythology and/or misunderstanding around Genesis stories ("rib-bone observations"), this one feels firmly footed in some form of contempt towards frivolous females. I mean, maybe I'm reading into "gluttonous, ungrateful wretch/You will fade, vomitous ephemeral wretch" the wrong way, I don't know, but as far as I can tell no one in history has named their daughter 'Antoinette' since that whole cake debacle, am I right?
The third song, "Hera," is definitely the best song on the album, having both the most dynamics and being the most enjoyable to listen to. That's not to say the other songs suck or anything, this one is just exceptionally good. Starting with an intro that's off-puttingly playful in a circus-Mr. Bungle type way, with hidden whispers circling the sound, the song then moves into Apathean's trademark back-and-forth 'breakdown' rhythm. The apex of the song is a huge-sounding riff that sounds like an Egyptian tomb - one with a real-live mummy in it - opening for the first time in millennia. Adding to that effect is the monk-like delivery of the vocals and the short, spiky-angled high-string guitar parts in that section. Really, the guitar work on this whole song is fucking awesome.
Things eventually find a break from the harshness in a bass-driven tribal-groove part and an unexpected but entirely appropriate violin cameo. It was at this point during my initial listen of the album, when bands like Faith No More and Between The Buried And Me are coming up as my top mental reference points, that I realized Apathean are at their core more of an alternative metal band than they are any type of 'core' (pun unintended but I got no qualms with it).
I had formally referred to them as "alternative metalcore", but the term 'metalcore' carries with it so much negative Shadows Fall/All That Remains baggage that it has become somewhat ineffective. Similarly, 'metallic hardcore' isn't necessarily appropriate either because that implies that the band would be mainly rooted within hardcore music and that certainly isn't the case with Apathean. 'Alternative metal' is usually used to describe more mainstream acts like Tool or Deftones, and that association might throw people off, but Apathean is 'alternative metal' the way bands like Gojira or - and this one is gonna be obvious - The Dillinger Escape Plan are 'alternative metal.'
Anyway, "Hera"'s bass-y mid-part gets ever-doper as jazzy guitar noodling is introduced and some clipped-up vocal snippets add up into a mess of sounds caustically surrounding each other. These guys are really good at creating a claustrophobic atmosphere with the amount of elements they swirl together. The song is de-fibrillated by one of their signature alt-breakdowns before it degenerates into a toy-keyboard phrase reminiscent of "Pandora"'s music box. Feeble sweetness.
On the whole it's a very well-put together song; the focus on production really paid off. Even the cassette version I have, which by virtue of being a cassette doesn't sound as clear as pretty much any other format it could be heard on, is nuanced yet forceful. Well done.
"Helen" begins seemingly right back in the same weird breakdown as the last couple songs, but that's not necessarily to mean that it comes off as overly-repetitive; instead the idiosyncratic consistency of pacing lends to the arching fullness of the record. A more classically heavy section follows, laced with off-beat arpeggiates that once again bring to mind Poison The Well and Converge, becoming absolutely giant around the 1:20 mark as the guitars take on an almost drone-y tone. The vocals once again layer upon each other with increasing discord until the chant of "LIES" overtakes things.
This song is the mirror opposite of "Antoinette" thematically; whereas that one is resentful and contemptuous, "Helen" is obsessively protective. Beginning with the line "don't you lay a single finger on her" it goes onto describe "walls built high" and to proclaim that "I will burn down the heavens/Just to rot by your side." The warlike devotion expressed here is clearly something destructive, especially given the anger in the "lies" chant at the end, indicating perhaps a betrayal that has now turned the former defensiveness into jealousy and/or loss of purpose.
The song's focus on over-reliance/co-dependence is also manifested in the song's ending coda, which unfortunately is an odd low point for the album. Out of the feedback frenzy that the song eclipses into (again, something Apathean does quite a bit) come uncharacteristic clean vocals contributed by the band's drummer Jason, singing the words "God only knows where I'd be without you" in a bizarre melody that doesn't resemble the original Beach Boys song whatsoever. Also baffling is the choice to sing this mutant melody in a strained, almost-RnB fashion, like something a Dance Gavin Dance vocalist might do. It's a very strange passage that just doesn't work, like they finally overstepped the boundaries of successful experimentation with that idea. I feel that they should have just used a sample of the actual Beach Boys song and run it through their noise machines to make it more off-putting. It just seems like that would be more effective both in terms of unexpectedness and eeriness.
It's too late now for that though I guess.
Speaking of eerie, "Annabelle" is a seemingly gentle instrumental track that, in its way, is more disturbing than any of the other music on the album. The song is primarily a plinking piano that - in contrast with the rest of the album's fury - sounds diminutive and fragile, yet menacingly so. Each note falls like a coin into a basin, echoing helplessly until fading into the atmosphere. Subtle layers of rainy cymbals, shoreline static, and ghost-coos wind in and out of the track, culminating in a broken-lullaby feel very much at odds with the rest of the album but affecting similar dread.
The children's entertainment product that I will make a reference to in regards to "Annabelle" is that episode of "Are You Afraid Of The Dark?" where the girl gets turned into a doll and trapped in an inter-dimensionary dollhouse. I can't remember too much more than that but it was fuckin' eerie I can guarantee you that much.
The album's final track "Jezebel" brings together most of the elements from the last 5 songs and once again stacks them onto each other until everything has been melted to the ground. Beginning with a guitar tone that reminds me of something I can't quite put my finger on (either a Refused song or a Pumpkins song I think - maybe even Norma Jean) it crashes into a morass of twirling guitars that are at once somewhat blackened and somewhat math-y. Despite already being probably the most blatant influence on Apathean's sound, this track reminds me of Dillinger more than any other song they have. The legion-esque chanting of "BURN THREE WORDS" is the most immediately cathartic moment on the album, perhaps because it's also the closest thing to a traditional breakdown as well.
A sludge-ish riff then takes over for awhile until the music-box strings that opened up "Pandora" descend back into the mix to end things where they began. That return to form lends to the notion that this album functions as a singular entity, an element unto itself despite obvious internal confusion as to what that self consists of.
The way the aching strings bookend the abstract pummeling, the spontaneous generation of sharp corners and pitfalls, and the confused rage and adoration that fuel the lyrics within - it's like dreadfully waking up to sweltering heat and spending the day beating yourself up both mentally and physically before eventually curling up into a ball and thankfully, finally escaping consciousness.
At least that's what I heard.
Part VII: The Reflection
Really? That was it? That was the result of 6 months of "thinking it over"? You suck man. I read that in like 5 minutes.
GOD, all the excuses for the time you wasted too, like come on bro, were you really soooo busy that you couldn't find a single night to sit down and plug in some headphones to that tablet you already told us you stream music from?
You listen to other bullshit ALL THE FUCKING TIME, you make little playlists each month ON THIS FUCKING BLOG in which you admit to not even liking half of what you listen to. What's your deal with that these days anyway? That's like all you even seem to think about anymore, how much other people's shit sucks. Its like what the fuck dude, what do you fucking do?
This???
You just fucking suck now. You used to be so different. You used to understand the concept of deadlines, you used to have a more relate-able style, you didn't used to for some reason revel in being an asshole.
Maybe its the drinking (OF COURSE ITS THE DRINKING you always try to underplay that even though you are the most obvious piece of shit alcoholic anyone has ever seen FUCK YOU) or maybe you've just lost your drive and your dopeness with age.
LOL; you were never really even that good anyway and you're not even really that old.
Either way, you're just not the same, and I'm just not really too interested anymore. I used to be your biggest fan too.
This whole thing sucks. You should delete it.
Part VIII: The Repudiation
Don't anyone ever ask me to write a review again.
Apathean is an alternative metal band based out of Riverside that I've been friends with since they first played at The Dial warehouse a little over a year and a half ago. I actually missed that initial performance, but it was uniformly reported to me to have been terrible. They were arbitrarily moving their equipment around mid-set, going for some odd shock-rock aesthetic perhaps, but whatever they did was lame according to everybody I talked to. They did already have an EP recorded called "Aggregation," however, that I enjoyed and saw obvious potential in; Kevin from Crisis Arm saw the same and gave them a talking-to about their performance shenanigans, which must have been taken to heart because when I did finally see them perform they were sufficiently dope. Apathean has grown steadily ever since then and in my opinion are one of the stronger, more unique groups in the current Southern California heavy music scene.
Besides just their badass music the people in the band are good-natured and quick-witted as well, and on the whole a cool group of people to have as friends.
Ashtin let me borrow some red basketball shorts one time that he didn't realize he was actually giving me.
Part II: The Request
Before their recent album "Eve" was even completed, Ashtin and Kevin were already asking me to review it in this very blog. As with the review request I got from The Nuclear Family several months prior, I could not for the life of me understand why anyone would want to subject themselves to my online 'opinion' because I just cannot help it but to hate on goddamn everything. They were hip to that, however, and specifically asked me to be harsh in my analysis. I can't remember which one it was, but I got instructions from one of them along the lines of 'find all the things that you don't like on the album, write extensively about those things, and we're gonna use those as [ironic] promo quotes.'
Whatever. Don't tell me what to do.
Part III: The Recording
I was not present at any stage of the recording of "Eve," so everything you are about to read is pure heresy.
My little brothers in The Coltranes were asked to do guest vocals on this album, which was actually my first notification of its impending existence. When they came back from the recording session Spencer was all pissy about something because that fool can always find something to be pissy about and that is why we are such good friends. The first gripe was that they had thought they were recording in Riverside and were already lagging, but when they picked up Ashtin he was like, "nah man the studio is in L.A! We're already late!" So right off the bat things were all rushed and shitty.
They got to the place and apparently it was this really really nice professional-status studio, which judging by the end result was the right choice, but the process came with certain formalities that the Tranes saw to be unnecessary. Namely, prior to entering the recording room Spencer was asked to empty his pockets and take off his shoes; his response to this was "MY SHOES?!?!?!?"
Apparently they thought he'd be stomping around or something; I don't know what would give anybody that idea, dude is so laid back.
The next grievance the boys had upon returning from the session was that their role of guest vocals was finished almost immediately, but because they had brought Ashtin up from Riverside they had to wait there ALL FUCKING DAY as the band recorded their parts. Knowing the Apathean kids, that was probably a meticulous, less-than-thrilling process to watch. They told me that the band was doing stuff with acoustic guitars and pianos and shit, which seemed odd at the time but proved beneficial in the long run.
Anyway, Spenny was given a sheet of paper or flashcards with random words on them - something like that I'm not entirely sure the process, like I said I wasn't there - and each word was recorded separately. A phrase was then sliced together from those words and can be heard at the end of "Hera" and its really cool, but we'll get to that later. JJ and Evan can both be heard screaming throughout the album but I'm not sure what parts. There is a lot of screaming on "Eve." For some strange reason Sam Coltrane is listed in the credits as well but wasn't actually there.
Part IV: The Release
I was was asked to perform some acoustic music at the release show for "Eve", which was held at the dA Center For The Arts up in Pomona; perhaps the first in a line of factors stacked against even my ancillary participation with the album, however, I nearly didn't make it. I had spent the previous Friday staying at the Beanvian Stalks Guava house, going to see Liquid play at Alaythia and generally just lok'ing back. I must not have made my intentions for the next day clear, however, because come Saturday morning they were not prepared to drive me from Hemet to Pomona.
Through consistent badgering and guilt-tripping, however, I did manage to convince them to drive me up there, and they promptly turned around upon dumping me in the parking lot near the space.
I met up with Crisis Cats pretty much right away and along with Navis loaded into their van; they had done a live set at some college radio station earlier that day and Cameron hurt her ankle while loading equipment or something, so we went on a search for and ACE bandage and a bottle of wine. Navis wanted a tall can as well and I was hungry as fuck so those were the side missions of the journey. The dA is in the same part of Pomona as The Glass House and Aladdin Jr.'s, which is to say it's nowhere near any convenience stores or liquor stores (at least that we know of), so we aimlessly went to a couple places that didn't have what we needed before finding a Mega Liquor. Their food choices were sparse but I picked up a giant Ramen Bowl and a YooHoo.
The show itself was real cool, with a mix of styles throughout the day. Although I did miss some of the day's events due to the late arrival and the liquor store tomfoolery, some of the stuff I caught that day included a very a good indie set from Point Atlantic, in what I believe was their first show; Odd Future-esque hip hop from the kids in LRDS; harsh noise from Typical Apache; a way-short 3-song set from Crisis Arm; hardcore dopeness from Left Astray; and a 51D set that I talked shit on even though I like that band. I didn't really eat too much of that Ramen Bowl because it had so much damn sodium and it was gross, so I think I was just cranky from no food and took it out by talking shit on 51D. I do stuff like that alot.
Apathean's own set happened in the downstairs basement area, and although their music is very heavy everybody was funtime dancing. I myself may have provided some unnecessarily aggro back-punch HC dancing at certain points but that was it. They are very engaging performers, clearly feeling the music that they are playing with a deepness many bands just don't have.
That show was in June.
Part V: The Response
For a number of reasons, this review took far longer than pretty much any assignment I have taken upon myself to complete in a very long while.
First came the structural issues. Seemingly as a matter of dark fate, perhaps further evidence of the universe opposing this review ever coming to be, all of my music listening devices broke like the very second that Apathean asked me to listen to their album. I hadn't had a working cassette player or record player for years, my iPod was lost on my birthday, and then my little budget CD player took a crap. My laptop finally then reached its fill of viruses and I was relegated to borrowing my mom's tablet to occasionally stream music I don't have to pay much attention to while I stand around drinking and getting high in my room. That wasn't the context in which I wanted to construct my thoughts on this album
Add to this lack of proper listening equipment my increasing responsibilities at my full-time job (that's for another blog), the hustle and bustle of work release and court bullshit (that's for another blog), and my spiraling alcoholism/depression (I don't wanna talk about it), and what you get is a complete lack of focus on anything even relatively intellectually demanding. For like 3 months I couldn't focus on a goddamn thing once I got out of my call center except for increasingly abstract and short "poetry" and "songs" that even I cannot make out the meaning of.
My writer's block was further compounded by the perfectly natural impulses that occurred over the weeks and months passed, where Ashtin and Kevin would bring up things like, "are you still gonna do that review?"/"when am I gonna get to see that review?"/etc. These reminders of my sloth flustered me and amplified the problem; the more guilt-ridden I became, the less I was able to confront the source of my anxiety. The more time that passed, the better I began to believe this article had to be, just to justify the lapse. My self-consciousness was engulfing my ability to get anything done.
Despite my excuses regarding stereos etc, the root of the problem regarding the ridiculous amount of time it took to write this piece lies more in my own compositional tendencies than on any external factors. The facts that I do actively enjoy Apathean's music and that I do interact with them semi-frequently, and that they would actually be anticipating this article's completion, those factors greatly changed the way I normally approach my 'reviews'. Much of the writing that I do manifests itself haphazardly and is regarding background events in my life, or music that I made a snap judgement on and have no real connection towards; this was different. I wanted to actually take the time to sit down with this album and pay attention to it and fully appreciate it, the way I used to enjoy music before everything was just background ambiance to my inconsequential nights at home. Even when Kevin Crisis had played me an early un-mixed version back in May, it was while I was still waking up and my attention wasn't fully there. I never properly digest anything anymore.
The fact that I actually really like this stuff became the primary roadblock to writing, a problem I didn't realize I'd face in the course of composing a simple album review. I came across the dilemma of not being able to talk about stuff I enjoy, not just about Apathean or their album, but in general; I can only talk shit about things I dislike, that I can dismantle and criticize and find problems with. I can't seem to form words of praise that feel genuine to me, like I've never actually expressed admiration in a from-the-heart way, like I don't even know why I like what I like. The more I try to justify or explain things about what I enjoy, the more I find myself speechless. Somehow it makes me feel like I don't actually know myself as well as I think I do and I criticize others and constantly talk shit about things because I cannot come to grips with what makes me feel joy in this world.
Identity Crisis.
At one point I was so desperate to force something out of myself that I considered pulling the ultimate dick move of all time: Just not even listening to the album at all and reviewing my non-listen. They did tell me to be insulting, after all, and I can't think of a bigger insult than outright dismissal. I ran that idea by Spencer, and while the hilarity of such a concept was apparent, he did say that it was a bit over-the-top dickish - even for me. Besides, I did enjoy the early preview of the album when at the Crisis house, and I felt like I'd be cheating myself more than anybody else if I didn't afford it a good solid listen.
My needs will always come first.
Somewhere between Halloween and Thanksgiving I got another budget stereo from my brother's thrift store and started listening to the cassette version of "Eve" on the regular, making notes along the way so I could construct something a little bit more substantial than my usual knee-jerk 'reviews.' Like the compulsive bastard that I am I wrote everything in a notebook first (scattered through several notebooks actually) and then put it together.
I did eventually write a review.
Part VI: The Review
Apathean's newest release "Eve", while only 6 songs long, is a dense piece of work that maintains a thematic focus and arc - despite the disjointed nature of the band's sound - that in my mind pushes it from the realm of being merely a post-demo EP to being a fully-fleshed-out album.The overriding motif of the work appears to be a fascination with femininity that encompasses everything from admiration and protectiveness to confusion and contempt. This is superficially indicated by both the album title and the individual song titles, all of which reference symbolic female figures from history and mythology, and is eluded to throughout the cryptic lyrics within.
The music starts out on "Pandora" with ominously sweet and minimalist acoustic strumming, almost like an old music box, almost like the opening to Poison The Well's "Botchla." It builds with elemental, paranoid noise - a fundamental characteristic stranding through the album - into a heavily pounding intro breakdown that sounds like the end of the world. It eventually swells and collapses under its own weight into a kind of swirling cacophony of distortion until taking the fetal position and finding those music box strings again.
For whatever reason this opening song - particularly the noisy disintegration it climaxes with - conjured a section of the story The Magician's Nephew, the chronological beginning of C.S. Lewis's 'Chronicles of Narnia' series (despite being the final book he actually wrote in his life). While on its face that sentiment may seem off, relating a children's fantasy book to a hardcore/metal album, the more I thought about it the more it made sense.
Simply the name of the song, referencing the release of something formerly hidden into a world that perhaps is not prepared for it, is illustrated early on the book. Two children discover an uncle's hidden attic where he is secretly performing alchemy-esque experiments, and he gives them both some rings which transport them to an alternate reality. It is later revealed that the magic rings were made using a dust given to the alchemist uncle by his godmother, dust from a box that she gave him on her deathbed with instructions to burn it. Instead of following suit and just destroying whatever was there, he searched the box and began his foray into 'magic.'
And so it was that the secrets of the past, intended to never be known again, were released anew into the world.
This etymological connection was not, however, what brought the book to my mind when listening to "Pandora." The ending section of the song, where everything is falling apart, evoked the destruction of Charn - the tale of which I shall recount as such:
Upon putting the magic rings on and being transported, the children find themselves in a lulling forest-like mid-world filled with small pools. The first pool they enter takes them to a desolate and clearly-decaying world with an incredibly large red sun dominating the landscape as though it were falling onto the planet itself. As they explore the terrain they come across an auditorium filled with what appear to be wax figures, expressions of utter terror emblazoned on their faces
At the front of the hall is a bell with ancient writing the children cannot comprehend, and which Penny rings against Digory's urgings against. This action awakens The Queen Jadis, who proudly admits that, generations before this new rebirth, she had intentionally uttered an unutterable magick Word to freeze the entire's world's existence until the whole thing rotted away. Simultaneously as this happened, the bell's ring hastened Charn's collapse, and while trying to escape the crumbling wreckage the children inadvertently bring the evil Queen back to their own 'real' world.
That's what "Pandora" sounds like to me: a red-tinted world about to be consumed by its gigantic dying sun, while the most deeply evil entity - the thing that most rightfully should have been destroyed - escapes to begin again.
On to the next song.
"Antoinette" is perhaps the most straightforward song on the album, but this is Apathean so what that means is "No Heroes"-era Converge-type stop-start pounding chugness with multiple layers of screaming and dissonance. The term 'breakdown' comes to mind but is ultimately inaccurate when describing this band's pacing; it's definitely heavy and timed meticulously but its not in the school of karate-core whatsoever. It's also not as tiresomely dragging as many 'sludge' type slow parts can often be, so modern breakdown terminology might just not be enough to describe them.
Lyrically the song is fairly direct as well, although again that's given Apathean's characteristic off-kilter approach. Whereas the previous song seemed to be referencing mythology and/or misunderstanding around Genesis stories ("rib-bone observations"), this one feels firmly footed in some form of contempt towards frivolous females. I mean, maybe I'm reading into "gluttonous, ungrateful wretch/You will fade, vomitous ephemeral wretch" the wrong way, I don't know, but as far as I can tell no one in history has named their daughter 'Antoinette' since that whole cake debacle, am I right?
The third song, "Hera," is definitely the best song on the album, having both the most dynamics and being the most enjoyable to listen to. That's not to say the other songs suck or anything, this one is just exceptionally good. Starting with an intro that's off-puttingly playful in a circus-Mr. Bungle type way, with hidden whispers circling the sound, the song then moves into Apathean's trademark back-and-forth 'breakdown' rhythm. The apex of the song is a huge-sounding riff that sounds like an Egyptian tomb - one with a real-live mummy in it - opening for the first time in millennia. Adding to that effect is the monk-like delivery of the vocals and the short, spiky-angled high-string guitar parts in that section. Really, the guitar work on this whole song is fucking awesome.
Things eventually find a break from the harshness in a bass-driven tribal-groove part and an unexpected but entirely appropriate violin cameo. It was at this point during my initial listen of the album, when bands like Faith No More and Between The Buried And Me are coming up as my top mental reference points, that I realized Apathean are at their core more of an alternative metal band than they are any type of 'core' (pun unintended but I got no qualms with it).
I had formally referred to them as "alternative metalcore", but the term 'metalcore' carries with it so much negative Shadows Fall/All That Remains baggage that it has become somewhat ineffective. Similarly, 'metallic hardcore' isn't necessarily appropriate either because that implies that the band would be mainly rooted within hardcore music and that certainly isn't the case with Apathean. 'Alternative metal' is usually used to describe more mainstream acts like Tool or Deftones, and that association might throw people off, but Apathean is 'alternative metal' the way bands like Gojira or - and this one is gonna be obvious - The Dillinger Escape Plan are 'alternative metal.'
Anyway, "Hera"'s bass-y mid-part gets ever-doper as jazzy guitar noodling is introduced and some clipped-up vocal snippets add up into a mess of sounds caustically surrounding each other. These guys are really good at creating a claustrophobic atmosphere with the amount of elements they swirl together. The song is de-fibrillated by one of their signature alt-breakdowns before it degenerates into a toy-keyboard phrase reminiscent of "Pandora"'s music box. Feeble sweetness.
On the whole it's a very well-put together song; the focus on production really paid off. Even the cassette version I have, which by virtue of being a cassette doesn't sound as clear as pretty much any other format it could be heard on, is nuanced yet forceful. Well done.
"Helen" begins seemingly right back in the same weird breakdown as the last couple songs, but that's not necessarily to mean that it comes off as overly-repetitive; instead the idiosyncratic consistency of pacing lends to the arching fullness of the record. A more classically heavy section follows, laced with off-beat arpeggiates that once again bring to mind Poison The Well and Converge, becoming absolutely giant around the 1:20 mark as the guitars take on an almost drone-y tone. The vocals once again layer upon each other with increasing discord until the chant of "LIES" overtakes things.
This song is the mirror opposite of "Antoinette" thematically; whereas that one is resentful and contemptuous, "Helen" is obsessively protective. Beginning with the line "don't you lay a single finger on her" it goes onto describe "walls built high" and to proclaim that "I will burn down the heavens/Just to rot by your side." The warlike devotion expressed here is clearly something destructive, especially given the anger in the "lies" chant at the end, indicating perhaps a betrayal that has now turned the former defensiveness into jealousy and/or loss of purpose.
The song's focus on over-reliance/co-dependence is also manifested in the song's ending coda, which unfortunately is an odd low point for the album. Out of the feedback frenzy that the song eclipses into (again, something Apathean does quite a bit) come uncharacteristic clean vocals contributed by the band's drummer Jason, singing the words "God only knows where I'd be without you" in a bizarre melody that doesn't resemble the original Beach Boys song whatsoever. Also baffling is the choice to sing this mutant melody in a strained, almost-RnB fashion, like something a Dance Gavin Dance vocalist might do. It's a very strange passage that just doesn't work, like they finally overstepped the boundaries of successful experimentation with that idea. I feel that they should have just used a sample of the actual Beach Boys song and run it through their noise machines to make it more off-putting. It just seems like that would be more effective both in terms of unexpectedness and eeriness.
It's too late now for that though I guess.
Speaking of eerie, "Annabelle" is a seemingly gentle instrumental track that, in its way, is more disturbing than any of the other music on the album. The song is primarily a plinking piano that - in contrast with the rest of the album's fury - sounds diminutive and fragile, yet menacingly so. Each note falls like a coin into a basin, echoing helplessly until fading into the atmosphere. Subtle layers of rainy cymbals, shoreline static, and ghost-coos wind in and out of the track, culminating in a broken-lullaby feel very much at odds with the rest of the album but affecting similar dread.
The children's entertainment product that I will make a reference to in regards to "Annabelle" is that episode of "Are You Afraid Of The Dark?" where the girl gets turned into a doll and trapped in an inter-dimensionary dollhouse. I can't remember too much more than that but it was fuckin' eerie I can guarantee you that much.
The album's final track "Jezebel" brings together most of the elements from the last 5 songs and once again stacks them onto each other until everything has been melted to the ground. Beginning with a guitar tone that reminds me of something I can't quite put my finger on (either a Refused song or a Pumpkins song I think - maybe even Norma Jean) it crashes into a morass of twirling guitars that are at once somewhat blackened and somewhat math-y. Despite already being probably the most blatant influence on Apathean's sound, this track reminds me of Dillinger more than any other song they have. The legion-esque chanting of "BURN THREE WORDS" is the most immediately cathartic moment on the album, perhaps because it's also the closest thing to a traditional breakdown as well.
A sludge-ish riff then takes over for awhile until the music-box strings that opened up "Pandora" descend back into the mix to end things where they began. That return to form lends to the notion that this album functions as a singular entity, an element unto itself despite obvious internal confusion as to what that self consists of.
The way the aching strings bookend the abstract pummeling, the spontaneous generation of sharp corners and pitfalls, and the confused rage and adoration that fuel the lyrics within - it's like dreadfully waking up to sweltering heat and spending the day beating yourself up both mentally and physically before eventually curling up into a ball and thankfully, finally escaping consciousness.
At least that's what I heard.
Part VII: The Reflection
Really? That was it? That was the result of 6 months of "thinking it over"? You suck man. I read that in like 5 minutes.
GOD, all the excuses for the time you wasted too, like come on bro, were you really soooo busy that you couldn't find a single night to sit down and plug in some headphones to that tablet you already told us you stream music from?
You listen to other bullshit ALL THE FUCKING TIME, you make little playlists each month ON THIS FUCKING BLOG in which you admit to not even liking half of what you listen to. What's your deal with that these days anyway? That's like all you even seem to think about anymore, how much other people's shit sucks. Its like what the fuck dude, what do you fucking do?
This???
You just fucking suck now. You used to be so different. You used to understand the concept of deadlines, you used to have a more relate-able style, you didn't used to for some reason revel in being an asshole.
Maybe its the drinking (OF COURSE ITS THE DRINKING you always try to underplay that even though you are the most obvious piece of shit alcoholic anyone has ever seen FUCK YOU) or maybe you've just lost your drive and your dopeness with age.
LOL; you were never really even that good anyway and you're not even really that old.
Either way, you're just not the same, and I'm just not really too interested anymore. I used to be your biggest fan too.
This whole thing sucks. You should delete it.
Part VIII: The Repudiation
Don't anyone ever ask me to write a review again.
Thursday, January 2, 2014
Playlist for December 2013
This is a list of all the albums, EPs, demos, singles, etc. that I listened to in their entirety during the month of December 2013. Afterward are my notes, lists of movies and stuff I read, and a list of what I saw performed live as well.
12/2/13
Seizures - "The Sanity Universal"
12/3/13
Pity Sex - "Feast of Love"
Chasms - "Riser" EP
Apathean - "Eve"
V/A - "Green Haze" mixtape
12/4/13
Trudgers - "Stag at the Social" cassette
12/5/13
The Rival Mob - "Mob Justice"
The Coltranes - "Sessions of Terror and Piss"
51D - S/T
V/A - "More is Not Enough" mixtape
12/6/13
Crisis Arm - "Junk Drawer" EP
Jethro Tull - "Bursting Out" live album
12/7/13
(Purple Tape)
12/9/13
The Gravitys - "Bring You Down"
12/11/13
Black Sabbath - "13" (extended version)
end of the summer - "Three" EP
12/12/13
Blondie - "Parallel Lines"
Smashing Pumpkins - "Siamese Dream"
The Gravitys - "Unplugged at The Dial" EP
12/13/13
end of the summer - "Three" EP
12/14/13
Apathean - "Eve"
The Down House - 2-song demo
Zoom - 5-song demo
Craven Idol - "Towards Eschaton"
Portal - "Vexovoid"
12/15/13
Brutal Truth/Bastard Noise - "The Axiom of Post Inhumanity" split (digital version)
God's America - "Our Bones Will Bleach In The Sun" EP
Weekend Nachos - "Still"
Wild Moth - "Over, Again"
Sex Prisoner - "State Property" EP
Kanye West - "Yeezus"
Drake - "Nothing Was The Same"
Their/They're/There - "Curtain Call" EP
12/16/13
ttng - "13.0.0.0.0."
12/17/13
Downstaairs - "weeping/creeping" EP
Culture Abuse - "The Day Dreams Of Nothing" EP
We Still Dream - Summer 2011 Sampler CD
Carnifex - "Dead In My Arms"
Los Olvidados - "Listen To This!!!"
12/18/13
Vanna - "Curses"
12/19/13
Mr. Bungle - S/T
Daylight - "Jar"
Apathean - "Eve"
And The Hero Fails - "Empire Smile"
12/20/13
Dubfound - 6-song demo
Knights Of The Abyss - "Juggernaut"
Circle Jerks - "Golden Shower Of Hits"
The Coltranes - "Never Sleep Again"/"The Man With The Hat" LP
12/21/13
Radiohead - "The Bends"
Black Flag - "What The..."
Johnny Soul Dog & The Moon Barkers - "Pollen Pastures" EP
Peachy Keene - "weightless in Wonder"
Palm Reader - "Unlucky"
Apart - "A Bright and Clever Hell" EP
Suzy's Dead - S/T EP
Love Anwar - "The Poppy Seed Patriot" EP
12/22/13
Faith No More - "The Real Thing"
Dystopia - "The Aftermath"
Gin Blossoms - "New Miserable Experience"
Faith No More - "Angel Dust"
Mighty Mighty Bosstones - "Let's Face It"
Himsa - "Courting Tragedy and Disaster"
12/23/13
Cadillac Freeze - "So Vibatious" EP
Negative Approach - S/T EP
12/24/13
Vanna - "Curses"
Dredg - "el cielo"
Seric - "Eyes of You" EP
Blink 182 - "Dude Ranch"
Smashing Pumpkins - "Adore"
The Wrath - "Failure" EP
Primus - "Sailing the Seas of Cheese"
System Of A Down - S/T
12/25/13
Social Distortion - "Prison Bound"
Run Doris Run - "Five More Songs And Then You Can Go Home" EP
Anthrax - "Persistence of Time"
Strung Up - "Society Rot In Hell" CD
12/26/13
Ghost - "Infestissumam"
Fugazi - "In On The Kill Taker"
Pedestrian - "Hunter" EP
Seal - "IV"
Lagwagon - "I Think My Older Brother Used To Listen To Lagwagon" EP
12/27/13
end of the summer - "Second" EP
Project X - "Straight Edge Revenge" EP
V/A - Victory Records Spring 2010 Sampler CD
Sugar Ray - "14:59"
Deaf Ears - 3-song demo
V/A - "What'd You Expect For Free? Vol. 18" Skratch Magazine Sampler CD
V/A - Metal Edge Magazine Jan/Feb 2008 Sampler CD
12/28/13
Daft Punk - "Random Access Memories"
The Horse I Rode - "Black Mirage"
V/A - "Mosh Pop" Epitaph Records Spring 2010 Sampler CD
Kevin Greenspon - "Push You Away Forever"
Gossimer - "Brioche Rib"
Dependence - "Overgrown"
Deicide - "Scars of the Crucifix"
Tough Stuff - "College" EP
Awaiting Shipwrecks/After Colony - split EP
V/A - "Survival of the Fattest" Fat Wreck Chords sampler CD
12/29/13
The Simpkin Project - "In the Wake"
V/A - "The Shape of Flakes To Come" No Idea Records sampler CD
The U-Men - "Solid Action"
V/A - "What Is Happening..."
12/30/13
Sigur Ros - "Takk..."
Holly & The Italians - "Miles Away"/"It's Only Me" 7"
12/31/13
The Gravitys - "Unplugged at The Dial"
Norma Jean - "O God, The Aftermath"
MUSIC NOTES:
- That Seizures album is DENSE
- I made those mixtapes from the beginning of the month years ago and they remind me of being a teen
- Damn Jethro Tull fuckin wails on that live album
- I cannot for the life of me remember what that purple tape is. It came in a green case. Somebody help me out here.
- New Black Sabbath album is alright. I wish the same could be said for the new Black Flag.
- God I love Blondie so much it's almost ridiculous...Outrageous.
- The Smashing Pumpkins fucking rule
- Wow Craven Idol and Portal are both just so damn wicked
- I was surprisingly entertained by and related to both Kanye and Drake's new albums
- I always forget that Vanna will be stuck in my head for days anytime that I listen to them
- Love Anwar is some groovy shit, much enjoyed
- "The lost horizons I can see are filled with bars and factories, and in them we all fight to say alive"
- Himsa is so much more boring than I had remembered
- Sleep paralysis
- "Apple Shampoo"
- My buddy Evan told me to check out Ghost like in the springtime and I finally got around to it at the end of this month...Shouldn't have waited so long. Shit is tight.
- I like "In On The Kill Taker" much more now than I used to when I first got it years ago
- Damn that Seal album fucking sucks
- I hate to say it but I kind of like Sugar Ray and I always have
- Man that Metal Edge Magazine sampler CD fucking sucks it's like the worst disc in my whole collection
- Everybody who was talking shit when Daft Punk's new album came out was completely justified that shit is lame
- The Horse I Rode is pretty good on their album but they fucking KICK ASS live
- "Push You Away Forever" . "Miles Away"
- Gossimer makes such pretty music
- That Simpkin Project album is sooooo fucking long
- The U-Men = The Cramps meet Oingo Boingo and are crazy? FREEZEBALL!
- I bought "Takk..." the week it was released back in like 2005 and I'm almost positive the first time I ever made it all the way through the album was a few days ago
LIVE:
12/7/13 - Gorgonized Dorks/Green Terror/Violent Opposition @ The Dial
12/21/13 - Palm Reader/Peachy Keene/Liquid/Johnny Soul Dog & The Moon Barkers/Sarah Soltys @ The Dial
12/26/13 - Brian Caldwell @ Shamrock's Pub And Grill
12/28/13 - Fly By Night/The Horse I Rode/Dependence @ The Dial
MOVIES:
12/3/13 - "The Snowman" VHS
12/10/13 - "Pleasure Unwound"
12/11/13 - "How The Grinch Stole Christmas"
12/15/13 - "Blade Runner"
12/17/13 - "Pauly Shore Is Dead"
12/18/13 - "Anchorman 2"
12/19/13 - "The World's End"
12/25/13 - "The Dark Knight Rises"
MOVIE NOTES:
- It's extremely uncharacteristic for me to have seen so many more movies than live shows this month
- I watched "The Snowman" with my mom like we did when I was a child, and although this was a version that didn't have David Bowie's introduction, I still love this cartoon
- Despite its title, "Pleasure Unwound" is an alcohol recovery counseling video and not a porno...Someday the two shall be one
- "I hate Christmas!"
- "Blade Runner" was a lot different than I had expected it to be. Same with "The Dark Knight Rises"...that's not to say I didn't enjoy both of them, just different than what I had expected
- Pauly Shore is such a piece of shit
- I went and saw "Anchorman 2" with the whole OG Gravitys family which made the experience that much better
- I had no idea the change that would occur midway through "The World's End" and the surprise made the experience that much better
COMICS:
12/17/13 - "Flipped" Issue 1
12/2/13
Seizures - "The Sanity Universal"
12/3/13
Pity Sex - "Feast of Love"
Chasms - "Riser" EP
Apathean - "Eve"
V/A - "Green Haze" mixtape
12/4/13
Trudgers - "Stag at the Social" cassette
12/5/13
The Rival Mob - "Mob Justice"
The Coltranes - "Sessions of Terror and Piss"
51D - S/T
V/A - "More is Not Enough" mixtape
12/6/13
Crisis Arm - "Junk Drawer" EP
Jethro Tull - "Bursting Out" live album
12/7/13
(Purple Tape)
12/9/13
The Gravitys - "Bring You Down"
12/11/13
Black Sabbath - "13" (extended version)
end of the summer - "Three" EP
12/12/13
Blondie - "Parallel Lines"
Smashing Pumpkins - "Siamese Dream"
The Gravitys - "Unplugged at The Dial" EP
12/13/13
end of the summer - "Three" EP
12/14/13
Apathean - "Eve"
The Down House - 2-song demo
Zoom - 5-song demo
Craven Idol - "Towards Eschaton"
Portal - "Vexovoid"
12/15/13
Brutal Truth/Bastard Noise - "The Axiom of Post Inhumanity" split (digital version)
God's America - "Our Bones Will Bleach In The Sun" EP
Weekend Nachos - "Still"
Wild Moth - "Over, Again"
Sex Prisoner - "State Property" EP
Kanye West - "Yeezus"
Drake - "Nothing Was The Same"
Their/They're/There - "Curtain Call" EP
12/16/13
ttng - "13.0.0.0.0."
12/17/13
Downstaairs - "weeping/creeping" EP
Culture Abuse - "The Day Dreams Of Nothing" EP
We Still Dream - Summer 2011 Sampler CD
Carnifex - "Dead In My Arms"
Los Olvidados - "Listen To This!!!"
12/18/13
Vanna - "Curses"
12/19/13
Mr. Bungle - S/T
Daylight - "Jar"
Apathean - "Eve"
And The Hero Fails - "Empire Smile"
12/20/13
Dubfound - 6-song demo
Knights Of The Abyss - "Juggernaut"
Circle Jerks - "Golden Shower Of Hits"
The Coltranes - "Never Sleep Again"/"The Man With The Hat" LP
12/21/13
Radiohead - "The Bends"
Black Flag - "What The..."
Johnny Soul Dog & The Moon Barkers - "Pollen Pastures" EP
Peachy Keene - "weightless in Wonder"
Palm Reader - "Unlucky"
Apart - "A Bright and Clever Hell" EP
Suzy's Dead - S/T EP
Love Anwar - "The Poppy Seed Patriot" EP
12/22/13
Faith No More - "The Real Thing"
Dystopia - "The Aftermath"
Gin Blossoms - "New Miserable Experience"
Faith No More - "Angel Dust"
Mighty Mighty Bosstones - "Let's Face It"
Himsa - "Courting Tragedy and Disaster"
12/23/13
Cadillac Freeze - "So Vibatious" EP
Negative Approach - S/T EP
12/24/13
Vanna - "Curses"
Dredg - "el cielo"
Seric - "Eyes of You" EP
Blink 182 - "Dude Ranch"
Smashing Pumpkins - "Adore"
The Wrath - "Failure" EP
Primus - "Sailing the Seas of Cheese"
System Of A Down - S/T
12/25/13
Social Distortion - "Prison Bound"
Run Doris Run - "Five More Songs And Then You Can Go Home" EP
Anthrax - "Persistence of Time"
Strung Up - "Society Rot In Hell" CD
12/26/13
Ghost - "Infestissumam"
Fugazi - "In On The Kill Taker"
Pedestrian - "Hunter" EP
Seal - "IV"
Lagwagon - "I Think My Older Brother Used To Listen To Lagwagon" EP
12/27/13
end of the summer - "Second" EP
Project X - "Straight Edge Revenge" EP
V/A - Victory Records Spring 2010 Sampler CD
Sugar Ray - "14:59"
Deaf Ears - 3-song demo
V/A - "What'd You Expect For Free? Vol. 18" Skratch Magazine Sampler CD
V/A - Metal Edge Magazine Jan/Feb 2008 Sampler CD
12/28/13
Daft Punk - "Random Access Memories"
The Horse I Rode - "Black Mirage"
V/A - "Mosh Pop" Epitaph Records Spring 2010 Sampler CD
Kevin Greenspon - "Push You Away Forever"
Gossimer - "Brioche Rib"
Dependence - "Overgrown"
Deicide - "Scars of the Crucifix"
Tough Stuff - "College" EP
Awaiting Shipwrecks/After Colony - split EP
V/A - "Survival of the Fattest" Fat Wreck Chords sampler CD
12/29/13
The Simpkin Project - "In the Wake"
V/A - "The Shape of Flakes To Come" No Idea Records sampler CD
The U-Men - "Solid Action"
V/A - "What Is Happening..."
12/30/13
Sigur Ros - "Takk..."
Holly & The Italians - "Miles Away"/"It's Only Me" 7"
12/31/13
The Gravitys - "Unplugged at The Dial"
Norma Jean - "O God, The Aftermath"
MUSIC NOTES:
- That Seizures album is DENSE
- I made those mixtapes from the beginning of the month years ago and they remind me of being a teen
- Damn Jethro Tull fuckin wails on that live album
- I cannot for the life of me remember what that purple tape is. It came in a green case. Somebody help me out here.
- New Black Sabbath album is alright. I wish the same could be said for the new Black Flag.
- God I love Blondie so much it's almost ridiculous...Outrageous.
- The Smashing Pumpkins fucking rule
- Wow Craven Idol and Portal are both just so damn wicked
- I was surprisingly entertained by and related to both Kanye and Drake's new albums
- I always forget that Vanna will be stuck in my head for days anytime that I listen to them
- Love Anwar is some groovy shit, much enjoyed
- "The lost horizons I can see are filled with bars and factories, and in them we all fight to say alive"
- Himsa is so much more boring than I had remembered
- Sleep paralysis
- "Apple Shampoo"
- My buddy Evan told me to check out Ghost like in the springtime and I finally got around to it at the end of this month...Shouldn't have waited so long. Shit is tight.
- I like "In On The Kill Taker" much more now than I used to when I first got it years ago
- Damn that Seal album fucking sucks
- I hate to say it but I kind of like Sugar Ray and I always have
- Man that Metal Edge Magazine sampler CD fucking sucks it's like the worst disc in my whole collection
- Everybody who was talking shit when Daft Punk's new album came out was completely justified that shit is lame
- The Horse I Rode is pretty good on their album but they fucking KICK ASS live
- "Push You Away Forever" . "Miles Away"
- Gossimer makes such pretty music
- That Simpkin Project album is sooooo fucking long
- The U-Men = The Cramps meet Oingo Boingo and are crazy? FREEZEBALL!
- I bought "Takk..." the week it was released back in like 2005 and I'm almost positive the first time I ever made it all the way through the album was a few days ago
LIVE:
12/7/13 - Gorgonized Dorks/Green Terror/Violent Opposition @ The Dial
12/21/13 - Palm Reader/Peachy Keene/Liquid/Johnny Soul Dog & The Moon Barkers/Sarah Soltys @ The Dial
12/26/13 - Brian Caldwell @ Shamrock's Pub And Grill
12/28/13 - Fly By Night/The Horse I Rode/Dependence @ The Dial
MOVIES:
12/3/13 - "The Snowman" VHS
12/10/13 - "Pleasure Unwound"
12/11/13 - "How The Grinch Stole Christmas"
12/15/13 - "Blade Runner"
12/17/13 - "Pauly Shore Is Dead"
12/18/13 - "Anchorman 2"
12/19/13 - "The World's End"
12/25/13 - "The Dark Knight Rises"
MOVIE NOTES:
- It's extremely uncharacteristic for me to have seen so many more movies than live shows this month
- I watched "The Snowman" with my mom like we did when I was a child, and although this was a version that didn't have David Bowie's introduction, I still love this cartoon
- Despite its title, "Pleasure Unwound" is an alcohol recovery counseling video and not a porno...Someday the two shall be one
- "I hate Christmas!"
- "Blade Runner" was a lot different than I had expected it to be. Same with "The Dark Knight Rises"...that's not to say I didn't enjoy both of them, just different than what I had expected
- Pauly Shore is such a piece of shit
- I went and saw "Anchorman 2" with the whole OG Gravitys family which made the experience that much better
- I had no idea the change that would occur midway through "The World's End" and the surprise made the experience that much better
COMICS:
12/17/13 - "Flipped" Issue 1
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